You may have noticed the lack of content from the blog this year. However, that doesn’t mean I’m at all giving up on writing. Here’s what is keeping me from my passion project.

1) I only have my phone to work from and the app limits me from what I really want to do with this platform. After talking with my cousin at our family reunion a few weeks ago, I am going to purchase a Chromebook which should help me get more content out. It’ll also be nice to have for those times when I want to attend Toastmasters meetings virtually.

2) I feel that sometimes my life is too simple to blog about. If I can be real for a minute, my life is not that interesting, or at least I think that. Coming out as “non-binary” brought some spark into my life but I feel as if I’m doing this alone most days. I almost gave up doing this but after hearing how much I inspired my friends and family, I’ve decided to keep it going. Beauty is about loving yourself, not caring about what others think.

3) I’ve spent 2022 feeling somewhat depressed. Maybe it’s because I’m no longer at a job I was familiar with for 13 years, or because I don’t feel I get the support I do for living my gender nonconforming life the way I do. Maybe it’s 2020 showing up a few years late, or it’s this crazy senate and gubernatorial race in PA. I know who I’m voting for. But it’s started to lift as I’ve learned to love myself and embrace my beauty. I’ll keep it going and look forward to a fun 2023.

One year later we look back at my final days working for WIS International as it merged with RGIS. What would the future hold for me? Would I stay on with the Traditional side or eventually transfer over to Dollar with everyone else? Or would I leave the company after a dozen years and start anew? Decisions decisions.

Before I look back on my final days at WIS, I need some context as to when the news of the merger broke and the events leading up to the breakup of our office.

It’s June 2021 and we are in West Mifflin. We finished the inventory for one of the many Targets we counted in the Pittsburgh market. The bosses and our supervisors were talking about news of the merger between WIS and its biggest competitor, RGIS, as the former bought out the latter. It was the biggest news for the company in over 15 years (when Washington and Western merged to form WIS).

For most of the summer, everything remained quiet. By September was when the rumblings began. People began to learn their assignments and if they would be counting big box stores or dollar stores. For me, I would be one of the few who would be going over to the traditional side.

Our last day as office 3609 was emotional and the end of an era. We were breaking up into a new team. For me I was losing my family and support system (I had come out as non in 2021 and wasn’t sure how the new crew would react to my sexuality). But there would be hope.

I began my short lived Traditional career with a Shop n Save in Penn Hills and an easy Pharmacy in Homewood. The inconsistent hours and travel had gotten to me and I knew I couldn’t make the next day’s Lowe’s in DuBois.

I got to experience CVS and that was the one bright shining moment in my tenure. The twilight of my WIS career would include Rite Aids with familiar equipment and even more familiar faces.

The first week was rough but I survived. I also put in applications to work at Goodwill that week and gave some thought to applying at Giant Eagle.

The second week saw me attend Cranberry High Noon Toastmasters and have lunch with some friends afterwards at Chen’s. Next day I made plans to attend the red carpet event for the new Laurel Highlands Toastmasters club at the Carnegie Library in Connellsville. I put in my applications at Giant Eagle, did a video interview, and did an in person interview at Giant Eagle.

I also made plans for Friendsgiving the weekend before Thanksgiving with my sisters.

The third and final week put me on those Rite Aids I knew well. Plus it was all WIS, no RGIS assists like last week. The penultimate inventory for me was in Mount Pleasant and Zach ran it. Nice to be close to home. My final inventory would be in Rochester (PA) with Maura.

I was on the phone doing an interview with a Giant Eagle recruiter and scheduling an interview for Goodwill in North Versailles. I also drove up to Eastgate Giant Eagle. I didn’t have an interview that day but I chatted with the HR guy whom I’d eventually train with next week.

My last inventory was WIS was done around 11:30. The drive home was bittersweet. I passed by all the retail in Robinson and went through both tunnels for the last time working for WIS. I traveled many miles for the company in 13 years and now it was time for a change.

That Friday I got the call from Giant Eagle that I was hired. I was out for a drive and on top of US 40 near Farmington when they called me and told me the good news. I would do paperwork and computer work (training) the next week.

End of an era indeed… and things are going well.

Mom needed candy for the piñata for Annabelle’s birthday party on Saturday, so she made a special trip to Candyland in Grantsville, Maryland. Since I had a night off Sunday, I was able to make the trip with her. We picked up my aunt and we made our way down 219.

This little candy store located on US 40 is a mecca of penny candy, as well as produce and more great items. Candyland has over 900 varieties of candy and many seasonal favorites. I shopped along with my mom and aunt and picked up some candy corn and dried fruit, along with some peanut butter fudge and my own bag of candy (some assorted tootsie rolls, chocolate, and other things). My aunt wanted to make some banana bread and picked up some mix. Those kids should be happy with all the candy on Saturday.

I also found Charleston Chews and Cow Tales, which my old neighbor used to give out on Halloween, as well as Emerald Leaves (a old favorite of Grandma and Great Grandma Gavatorta).

Hilltop Fruit Market is located off I-68 and at the intersection of US 219 and US 40 in Grantsville. It opened in 1958 as a roadside market and is a wonderful tourist trap. Also, check out the Fruit Bowl in Cumberland and the Farmers’ Market in Oakland (near Deep Creek Lake).

After we bought our candy 🍬, we made our way to lunch at the Casselman Inn & Restaurant. The building is quaint and there were rooms available. The restaurant does good business as we saw when we were leaving. There was a small store inside as we made our way to our table. We were seated in front of a fireplace. What really stood out about the Casselman Inn were the beautiful geraniums which you could get for $7.99. I also saw a National Road obelisk mile marker which showed the distance to other cities located on US 40.

The drive was nice and the leaves are beginning to turn in the mountains of Somerset County Pennsylvania and Garrett County Maryland. Getting there and coming home we drove over the mountain. There we saw some color change that should be more visible in a few weeks.

Recently a few of my Giant Eagle colleagues caught wind of my gender nonconforming lifestyle as I broke down to them how I live my truth. One of them recommended watching Queer Eye and namedropped Jonathan Van Ness and Tan France, two of the show’s Fab 5. I just started watching the Netflix series last week and I’m already hooked.

I’m not far enough into the series to do a real detailed six pack about Queer Eye, but I have six things so far that I like about the show. Without further ado, let’s open up a six pack of cold hard facts on Queer Eye.

I’ll post the first three today and the other three this weekend.

1. The Netflix series is based off the original Queer Eye for the Straight Guy. That show aired on Bravo during my Slippery Rock years (2003 to 2007).

2. Queer Eye is like: What Not to Wear, A Makeover Story (aired on TLC in the early 2000s), any design show that you could name on said network, and any cooking show you could name on Food Network, all rolled into one. But the catch is that it’s all gay guys working on improving straight people and their living space, hence the name. I have a feeling Clinton Kelly and Randy from Say Yes to the Dress would have made it on the original show or as an advisor on the Netflix series.

3. The Fab 5 all have their field of expertise. Tan France is the fashion expert. Karamo Brown is the culture expert. Bobby Berk is the design expert (hello HGTV). Antoni Porowski is the cooking expert (hello Food Network), and Jonathan Van Ness (my fave and you know why) is the grooming expert. I learn something from every one of these great guys and I’m only five episodes in.

Look for the second half of my Queer Eye Six Pack this weekend.

I spent my summer vacation abandoning my gender nonconformity for a moment and then bringing it back. I had plenty of support from my colleagues, Toastmasters, as well as family. I still don’t have my confidence up 100%, but I’m getting there.

Beauty is about loving yourself, not caring about what others think.

Everyone who knows me knows 2021 was my year of turning 40. It was also my year of gender nonconformity, and it was something that came to light a few years ago but I’ve also struggled for years to keep it a secret. I was praised for living my truth, but I also faced criticism and was fed with fear about “living my truth”.

I temporarily abandoned my gender nonconformity because I wasn’t sure I was making an impact, plus I thought that I was distancing myself from my family. Even though a majority of the Gaffron family was loving my story. I also wanted to back to church, at the time, and felt I should have started clean.

The silence didn’t last long, however.

My fellow District 13 Toastmasters told me they stood by my gender nonconformity and loved seeing me with my Coach purse (I have many). I showed that off plus my outfit at summer TLI. But, what broke the silence was when I broke down to my cousin at the Gaffron farm at the Fourth of July picnic.

I told her everything. Especially how I was ostracized for “living my truth”. My cousin and I both had a good cry (I don’t care if this too embarrassing to post) as I broke down to her. She provided me with kind words and told me how beautiful I was and to keep being me. Her husband provided us with tissues and it felt good to have someone to talk to. It seems as if most of my family is supportive of my decision to “live my truth” as well as shown by the emotional support I was given at the farm that day.

At work, I feel like I have a couple of colleagues standing with me as well. It’s hard to talk about and to think of how those people made me feel last fall about being me. But my coworkers lent their ears to hear what I had to say and were proud of me for living my truth. Don introduced me to Queer Eye and asked me about Jonathan Van Ness (one of the stars of the Netflix series who is non binary and wears women’s clothes). I’ll talk about Queer Eye in a future blog.

After abandoning what I love to please just a few people, I came right back to my truth and have no plans to abandon it now. Watch out world.

It’s been a while since I last posted on here. It’s been that kind of summer. Other than working a lot, I really haven’t done much besides stay at home, work on my Spanish with Duolingo, and take a few trips outside the house. Since leaving WIS, I don’t travel for work like I used to and that’s a good thing. But in a way, it’s also felt like a culture shock.

In my first blog in over a month, I’ll post three things that really stood out during this less than active (at least for me) summer.

The first thing was our first in person club officer training since December 2019.

We held our first in person Toastmasters training event since December 2019, just before the world shut down because of the pandemic. The event was held at Westmoreland County Community College. Overall, it went very well. We had a hybrid event, meaning some people attended in person and others attended online. It looks like hybrid is going to be the way to go, for better or worse.

The theme was very summery and we were greeted with leis being put on us. As for the training, it went very well. We learned a lot from our presenters and officer breakout sessions. Greensburg also got credit for their officers being training (you have to have a minimum of four officers trained to get credit for the Distinguished Club Program).

Future District 13 Toastmasters events include this Saturday’s Fall Symposium, and the next club officer training which will be held December 3 at the same place that it always is. Looking ahead to 2023, the Spring Conference will be held in April in the South Hills (time, date, and location are tentative and may be subject to change).

This morning’s Stylish and Hungry segment takes me to a local Pittsburgh based establishment that’s fallen on hard times recently but still has a few locations that remain open.

Hartley King opened his first store in 1967 in North Versailles as Kings Country Shoppes. This name was later changed to Kings Family Restaurants to indicate the establishment was a restaurant rather than a store. By 1980 the number of restaurants had grown to 7, and 24 by 1990. Other locations included Monroeville, Plum, Upper St. Clair, and Delmont (where I got my first job in 2006 after college).

I stopped in for breakfast on this fine Friday morning at the Hempfield location just two minutes from home. I was seated as soon as I walked into the restaurant and had my order taken immediately. It wasn’t busy on this day but so far I got great service.

I ordered the Wake Up Breakfast, which was a popular item when I worked at the Delmont location 15 years ago (has it been that long). I had my choice of eggs, bacon or sausage, hash browns and home fries, toast, and pancakes or French toast. My server was friendly and very professional.

Every part of the Wake Up was good and I cleaned my plate with no trouble. My server deserves a nice tip for her service and for taking good care of me. I hope this Kings will remain open for the foreseeable future. Just wish Hartley would kept the operation in the family when he sold it in 2010.

My experience this morning gets an A-. A+ for the service and the food, D for the way Kelly Capital has run this once great chain into the ground, but I’m generous and I’ll curve it higher.

Kings was my first real job after I graduated from Slippery Rock. I won’t get into too much detail but I want to keep it real. I wasn’t happy there.

Knowing what I know now, I would have appreciated the job way more than I did back in 2006 or I would have even continued with Eat’n Park. I was too concerned with trying to find a job in my field (even if I wasn’t going to be successful at it… like sales) so people wouldn’t think I went to college for nothing. I almost even considered going back to school to earn a pointless degree just to make up for how bad I thought my experience was at Slippery Rock.

But there was some good that came out of Kings as well. I built good relationships with my coworkers as well as the higher ups whenever they came in. I also was the Frownie at various community events like the company picnic at Kennywood and the Junior Golf Tournament at Nemacolin. I was proud of representing the company, but mad at myself for not being able to let the past go. The downturn in the economy late in 2008 meant I would have to look for a job elsewhere.

You can’t take back the past but you can learn from it. If I wasn’t so hung up on going back to school or looking for a job in my field back in 2007, my mind would have been more focused on succeeding with Kings (or even Eat’n Park). If I didn’t stress myself out on others’ negative opinions about the job, working at Kings would have been much more enjoyable. Same deal with WIS though I did tune those guys out much more in the later years.

I wish I could have learned to walk away. It would have saved me a lot of trouble, heartache, and emotion in the long run.

Bye everyone. ❤️ you.

After last season’s success with this food blog, I decided to give it a go once again. Stylish and Hungry is back and better than ever for season two. I’ll review all kinds of restaurants from steakhouses to the family restaurants as well as the best spot for brunch. I’m hoping to try out the Kitchen on Main very soon. I also want to review Kings as it is a dying breed in our area and was once thriving. Plus I have history there having been a former employee.

Longhorn Steakhouse has been at its location in front of Westmoreland Mall since the early 2010s (tentatively speaking) and like Texas Roadhouse, is a great place to go if you’re craving a good steak (or other comfort food if you’re not digging a sirloin or rib-eye). Longhorn is owned by Darden, the same company which also owns The Olive Garden and formerly, Red Lobster. Look for my reviews on those places at a future date.

I arrived at the restaurant around 5:30 and was promptly seated by the hostess. The server didn’t waste any time taking my order (it also helped that I knew what I wanted). Maura had eaten at Longhorn before and she suggested the Garlic Parmesan Chicken. That is what I ordered along with a baked potato with the works. For my drink I ordered a seasonal Sam Adams Boston Lager. I was definitely feeling full after my meal.

My experience was memorable and I will definitely be back at some point (probably in the Fall or before Christmas). I’ll definitely be ordering a steak so I can compare Longhorn vs. Texas Roadhouse to see whose is better.

The music wasn’t too loud and the atmosphere was just right. At 5:30-6 it was the height of the dinner rush so there was definitely a crowd but not too hectic. Just lots of people out and about having a good time on a Wednesday night. Having the mall close by and being off a major road (US 30) really helps bring business in too.

My server took good care of me and the manager also came to my table as well to make sure I was happy with my chicken.

Grade: A+ (for excellent service and hospitality, as well as the food).

The restaurant also has a managing partner. Here’s some in depth information on what a restaurant managing partner does.

A restaurant managing partner works on restaurant operations while also handling budgeting and planning tasks. A managing partner has a partial stake in the restaurant. Their duties include reporting performance and financial figures to corporate ownership or silent partners and implementing their strategies and improvement plans in the restaurant. They also handle day-to-day tasks such as hiring and training employees, negotiating with vendors and suppliers, and ensuring customer satisfaction.

A manager usually delegates responsibilities to the restaurant’s assistant management team. They may sometimes have other duties that involve market research, promotion, and public relations.

First Stylish and Hungry 2022 post is in the books. My next restaurant review will take me out to breakfast. I’m thinking either Kings or Eat’n Park. Down the road, I will be trying South Greensburg restaurant (my second time there) as well as Keystone Kitchen in New Alexandria. Plenty of places to eat, drink, and be merry

Are my blogging days over?

Am I abandoning my gender nonconformity?

If you follow my blog, you’re probably wondering where my content has been lately. You’re expecting that Stylish and Hungry post that inspires you to eat a meal at the restaurant or enjoy an iced coffee at the coffeehouse that I review. You’re asking yourself, “Did James stop blogging?” or “Is James all right?”

2021 provided you with great content and some great memories to take away from last year. 2022 has not been quite as exciting. You can attribute that to my new job and the crazy hours, the higher prices (including $5/gallon for gas), and I’m just not feeling confident to show myself because some have told me my gender nonconformity is setting me up to get teased and ridiculed.

Last night, I got dressed up for my monthly dinner with Mr. Clougherty and felt good. So far I’ve been taking baby steps. I’m still afraid because of what might happen but really, it’s not that bad when I go out in public with a bag or when I rock a blazer. Seriously, who cares if people look at me weird? I’m more afraid of the speculation than what might actually happen. It’s like my friends and family tell me, “BE YOU”.

Is the blog going away?

While I’m hard up for content right now and sitting on 60 posts, I’m still in this for the long haul. I’m slowly breaking out of my shell and getting out of my comfort zone. I still have plans to do my Stylish and Hungry restaurant reviews. I just haven’t scheduled them yet as I was unsure when I would be available. I do have some places in mind and a few are in Ligonier.

Did I abandon my gender nonconformity?

In addition to what was said earlier about it, it really wasn’t because my folks didn’t support it, but because I was thinking about going back to church. It would have been for the best to drop it because I wanted a fresh start. But would I have been really happy not being myself? The answer to that is most likely a big fat NO.

That all being said, expect some great content coming soon. I have a Stylish and Hungry blog post on the way. I’m looking at next week. Here’s some of the places I plan on reviewing.

The Kitchen on Main (Ligonier)

The Wicked Googly (Ligonier)

Ruthie’s Diner (Ligonier)

French Express (Latrobe)

Stanton Daily Grind (New Stanton)

South Greensburg Restaurant (Greensburg)

I also plan on reviewing some chain restaurants as well. Kings, sadly, is a dying breed and it used to really thrive in the Pittsburgh area, so I plan on given them a review and, doing some return reviews as well. I also plan on doing a Pumpkin Spice tour once again this year fall beginning in late September. More on that coming soon.

Stylish is back, for good, and I assure you there will be great content. Stay tuned.

Our District Historian is hard at work once again on this wonderful look back at what our District used to be like. We look back at 1957 for this week’s Throwback Thursday.

The District reached 40 clubs and counting by 1952, but it took some time for the next club to charter. That would in March 1957 when the Coraopolis club was founded. They would meet Mondays at 8PM at the Coraopolis YMCA.

TLI makeup training will be held next Saturday at 9AM, as well as July 18 in the evening, and also on July 30 in the morning. Plenty of time to register so you attend training and get credit for your club. Attending club officer training will fulfill #9 on the Distinguished Club Program.

Next week, Cranberry Township will be hosting its annual Cranberry Community Days! Several Toastmasters clubs from the surrounding area will be present to share the Toastmasters mission and potentially gain some new members. Both Cranberry High Noon and Cranberry Area clubs plan to be in attendance.

Cranberry Community Days will be held next Thursday, July 14, through Saturday, July 16, at Cranberry Community Park, located at 111 Ernie Mashuda Dr., Cranberry Township, PA 16066. Hours of operation will be Thursday from 4-10PM, Friday from 4-11PM, and Saturday from 1-11PM. Cranberry Community Days is a big draw for the area with over 32,000 in attendance, providing enjoyment for children of all ages, adults and senior citizens. Enjoy FREE Parking, FREE Admission and over 200 VENDORS!

Something to think about as Toastmasters when discussing the Distinguished Club Program. Look at the first six goals, your educational goals. It’s beneficial to us and to the club when do our speech projects and achieve educational awards. Every goal we achieve is a goal for club towards Distinguished Status.

It’s important to talk up Toastmasters with your colleagues, friends and family. The guest whom you bring to your meeting could be the member that the club needs to fulfill their membership goals, and become eligible for the DCP. If Penn Hills could go from Extinguished to Distinguished, there’s no reason your club can’t grow its base either. The sky’s the limit! Pay it forward. New members bring new prospectives and add value to a club.

We just had club officer training a few weeks ago and plenty of opportunity to attend makeup training for you to get credit towards that ninth requirement. Why should you give up part of a Saturday to attend TLI? Because it’s one of the best ways you can come into the new Toastmaster year confident in mastering your role as club officer. Plus you get to learn from those who have done the role before. Trained officers are better equipped to support their members.

Get your slate of officers set early and get that list sent to World Headquarters. Not only does it look good but it shows effective communication among the officers and that has a positive effect on the club. Get the word out about dues being due and get it done early and often. If you have to send mass emails to get your minimum of eight members do it!

Remember, it’s all about the member and the exceptional service that you provide them.