The word fear takes on two different meanings. Let’s break it down both ways. F.E.A.R. can stand for two different ways to handle a situation. I can’t take credit for this quote as it comes from the great Zig Ziglar. F.E.A.R means to Forget Everything and Run or, to Face Everything and Rise.

The choice is yours.

For someone who has anxiety, FEAR can mean the former. It’s easier to do this when things don’t go their way but it doesn’t mean a win. I’m not talking about a fear of public speaking, dying, or spiders, though these things frighten me just as much. For someone who’s changing the status quo and changing the world, I’m going to have to face naysayers. Those critics could be in public, in front of a computer screen on social media or a podcast, or people close to me trying to “help me”. I also have to learn that I’m going to do this alone (already there). In this case, FEAR should mean Face Everything and Rise.

What I need to combat my anxiety is simple. Just keep being me. Easier said than done though. I look forward to something and then the day or night of, fear comes over me like a dark cloud that covers the sun. I feel like I set myself up for disappointment because I want instant approval and when I don’t get it, I feel disappointed. I feel like I get guilt-tripped just for being me. I fear rejection and I fear getting yelled at. Instead of depending on others’ approval, why not God’s approval or my own approval?

If you watched the news today or were perusing on social media, you learned that Joe Biden has stepped aside from running for re-election in 2024. He has endorsed his running mate, Kamala Harris, but it’s not a sure thing yet. This is good for Biden as he needs to preserve his legacy in politics. He’s had a good run and now it’s time to see who can run against Donald Trump in the election. The last four elections have had me living in fear or have seen me get ostracized for who I’m voting for. If Kamala runs, she has my vote.

Any comments on this post concerning the election will be deleted. I’m talking about fear, not politics (which most people don’t like talking about for fear of offending someine).

When one thinks of what the biggest fear is, they look no further than public speaking. If you have fear of getting up in front of a group and talking for a peiod of time, there’s no better place to go than to a Toastmasters meeting. Face everything and rise.

The first speech, also known as the ice breaker, is the toughest one to give. Getting up and presenting it in front of your club, and accomplishing said speech, is like a huge weight lifted off of you.

One of my favorite scenes in Harry Potter comes from the third film where Professor Lupin has the students naming their biggest fear. For Ron Weasley, it’s spiders. For Neville Longbottom, it’s Professor Snape. In the second movie, Ron goes into the forest with Harry and Hagrid’s dog Fang to clear Hagrid’s name, even if it means all of them getting eaten by Aragog’s offspring. He and Harry faced everything and rose, even though it would have been much easier to do with Hermione there. To me that was one of the scenes that really firghtened me. Expelliarmus!

Sometimes, I just need to take my own advice, face everything, and rise!

Recently, our Toastmasters District achieved a huge milestone. We became a Smedley Distinguished District. This has never been achieved before in District 13. It’s well deserved to give a big shout out to all the clubs and members for making this happen. Coincidentally, District 13 became the 13th district to make the dashboard as a Distinguished District. Both of these milestones were achieved in Toastmasters’ centennial year.

Thursday night, I had plans to go to Ligonier and spend some time at the Ligonier Night Market. Upon arriving in town, I couldn’t find parking. To be fair, the only option I looked at was the Y which was full. Instead of searching for another spot, I lost patience, gave up, and left. I never thought I’d roll over like that and was completely embarrassed with myself. But I didn’t go home and made a night of it. I turned a humiliating loss into a surprising victory!

I salvaged a disappointing night by getting dinner at Wendy’s. I ordered the chicken nugget meal and turned my night around. My only regret was not ordering the Spicy Nuggets that caught my eye. Next time Wendy’s. After dinner I spent some time in downtown Greensburg and made the most of what was initially a failed attempt at a great night. I practiced French on my Duolingo app and finished the chapter I was reading in Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. I treated myself at the new ice cream place on Pennsylvania Avenue. Millie’s has other locations in the Pittsburgh area including Murrysville.

A quick review on Millie’s as I was going to do one Thursday night in Ligonier. I was impressed with the service. The girls working there were very friendly and even gave me the option to sample flavors before choosing. Menu options were good for an ice cream shop, as I had the option to choose a cone, sundae, or a float. If you’re conscious about the dairy you want in your ice cream, you have a choice. The float I ordered could be made with oatmilk. I was happy with my cookies and creme float. I love the atmosphere as well. A few places to sit but there is a little park across the road where you can sit near the new RSVP gift shop. Millie’s is in the former Wight Elephant location. Grade: A

One of these days, I’d love to eat breakfast at Nico’s (old Invisible Man Brewing location) and give a review of the place. This city has a lot of nice little eateries and cafes, and I’m still proud to be a resident of Greensburg.

I figure I could have planned things a little better if I wanted to make a night of it in Ligonier. Truth is, I worked nine days straight and probably would have benefited from having the night off to recover. But I didn’t completely write off the night as a total loss and went to Greensburg instead. I went to Millie’s and got in a walk to fill my exercise ring which I need to do more often.

I’m enjoying my time in Proverbs this month as well as the book on prayer that I’ve been reading (by Chrystal Evans Hurst, daughter of pastor Tony Evans). This week, my old church is doing a sermon on Proverbs. I’m itching to get back to church (when I can) and if my anxiety does not rule the day. I’m planning to attend the next bible study at Cutie’s on July 29. The turnout was great for the last one and from reading the post on their socials, the study will be on anxiety.

Finally, this election season is going to make us all crazy if we don’t get away from social media or the news. I don’t like talking about politics on my blog. I’ve had problems with people on both sides when it comes to the subject. Even those I agree with are making me nuts and raising my anxiety levels. That’s why I like doing what I do here, posting content for you guys that is low anxiety and uplifting.

Television networks tell us what is right, and the social media algorithms (which I think are a complete joke) produce content with which we agree or align with our recent viewing habits. Feelings have won out over facts and truth. However, truth is greater than feelings. I’m blessed to get back into my walk with God and put the last few years behind me.

This week my mother, sister, and niece took a short vacation up to Erie. They spent time at the beach, went to Waldameer, and ate lunch at Sara’s. Fun fact about the property is that the bn auilding housing the diner (Sally’s) used to be the old Norwin Diner. A even had an opportunity to spend the day with her Erie cousins. We’ve taken trips to Erie dating back to the late 1990’s. Most of the places that we stayed at weren’t perfect by any stretch of the imagination but we always made the most of it for a night or two. The El Patio was one of my favorite places to stay when we were in Erie. That place is now a Sheetz. In today’s blog, I’m going to talk about some of the places I’ve seen in Erie, and I’ll also take you to Cape May as well. Later, I’ll look ahead to some more fun activities planned for this month.

Some of my best memories of Erie have included: going downtown to the bay front and riding the elevator up to the top of the Dobbins Landing. What an amazing view to look down at the city. One of my first years that we went we took a boat ride on the Lady Kate around the bay. Another thing that was fun was learning about Erie’s history at the Maritime Museum and getting to know more about the famous Flagship Niagara. Later years have brought me to Erie for Toastmasters functions, including a couple of conferences in 2012 and 2014. I regret missing our District’s first annual Fall Symposium in Erie in October of 2018. I was attending SRU Homecoming that Saturday. But I made up for it the next year close to home. Also memorable was the birth of this blog in 2019 while I was on a work trip in Erie just before Thanksgiving.

In addition to Erie, I’ve also vacationed in Cape May. Over a ten year period from 2009 to 2018, I went eight times. One of those years I didn’t go I went to Disney World (a definite bucket list item that I’d love to talk about in a future blog). Many times I went with my aunt, and a few times with my parents. Some trips were great, others not so much. But I’m not here to dissect the trips, thus I digress. Some of my favorite places to eat include Uncle Bill’s Pancake House for breakfast. Great breakfast options no matter what you choose. Make time on your trip to go to the beach and swim in the ocean. If you’re lucky, you’ll get a hotel with a nice pool too. Grand, I’m talking about you. In the local shopping area there are plenty of great places to have lunch. I would suggest Stewart’s but that has since closed. Make sure you stop in to Delia’s 5&10. For dinner, what better place to eat than the Lobster House? Perfect for dining in or take out. My first year in Cape May I even tried lobster. If you’re staying for a few days or a week, there are a couple of Acme grocery stores in the area if you have a suite or a beach house.

Besides shopping and dining, there are other fun things to do in Cape May. Some of those include taking a tour of the Victorian Houses in town. Cape May has some of the best victorian houses outside of San Francisco. Take advantage of the sunset and go to Sunset Beach. Go to the lighthouse and look down on the water, and consider taking the ferry to Lewes (Delaware). While I’ve experienced Cape May in the summer, I’d love to see how beautiful this beach town is at Christmas. Maybe that’s a future trip right there.

Finally, we’ve hit the midpoint of summer 2024. There’s still lots of fun things to do before the kids go back to school next month.

Tomorrow night is the Ligonier Night Market and I’ll be heading to my little Stars Hollow to check it out. Look for a Ligonier restaurant review from me in the next blog. This weekend is Picklesburgh on the North Shore. While I’m not sure I’ll attend, the event will be bringing a lot of people out to the city. Giant Eagle is showing off their pickles and other themed items.

I’ve been reading great things about my favorite new coffee shop in Greensburg. Their Bible study has had great turnouts and I’m thinking about going to their next one at the end of July. I’m making a comeback in my walk with God so this will tie in nicely. I’m halfway through Proverbs and I’ll be seeing where God is leading me next.

Normally I don’t talk about politics on my blog. Actually, I don’t ever talk about politics on this blog. Too divisive and I don’t want my readers to get offended or know where I stand, and I feel it’s better that way. I use this platform to offer my take on life, albeit I may tell the same story on separate posts. That’s just my style.

Yesterday’s events were a shock to the system and what happened in Butler was really crazy. Regardless of where you lean in your political views, this was messed up. I used to be crazy about politics, in fact a little crazy. I had to dial it back (a lot). This was before the election that pitted Barack Obama vs. Mitt Romney.

Does it change how I feel about the man running for President? Probably not. But all people are human beings, despite what you may think of them. I don’t want to make this controversial, but I’m sure it will be.

Political drama aside, I’m returning to my regularly scheduled programming after trying something different for a few weeks. What I meant by that is that I’m keeping with tradition and sticking to my routines. By that I’m talking about four days a week reading Harry Potter (Monday, Tuesday, Thursday, Friday); and, blogging (Wednesday, Saturday and Sunday). After a busy June when I posted content my entire week off, I’m cutting back in July and August and trying to enjoy summer.

I’m officially into the final book of the series, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. I don’t know where I’ll go after I leave Hogwarts. I’m leaning towards Percy Jackson because I want to get into Greek Mythology. I’m also getting back into more inspirational reading and soon, I’ll be going to church again.

While I’m not going to blog as much in July and August (though I did average 12 posts a month in 2023), I plan to pick things up in the Fall. For December, I’m hinting at going full throttle and posting a lot of holiday content. I’m thinking about calling it my “25 Blogs of Christmas”. More on this to come when we get to cooler, pumpkin spice drinking weather.

Finally, I hit 50000 XP in French on Duolingo and have over 150000 XP overall. That’s quite an accomplishment, considering I was learning three to four languages at one time. I’ve whittled it down to just French in the last couple of months. I began my Duolingo run in April of 2022 learning Spanish. I’m proud of myself for staying commited and I have over 800 days on the app. I know about Paris as well and the French language, including the Montmartre and the Seine River. I wish I’d have taken a foreign language in high school. If I did, it would have been French.

Future languages include learning a Scandanavian language, either Swedish or Norwegian.

Back in April of 2023, I wrote a blog celebrating my rebirth in Toastmasters. I had just accepted the nomination to become President of the Greensburg club. I was looking forward to leading the club to success once again. We gained some members, lost some, and gained some more back, and ended up Select Distinguished.

Today’s content may be the same as the blog I wrote from two Springs ago. Don’t like it? That’s OK. It’s not your story.

Despite a good year for the club, there’s a few things I still could have done to be a better example. One would have been starting a new path and completing two levels. It still wouldn’t have gotten us to President’s but it would have kept my speaking skills well-polished.

The 2023-24 Toastmaster year was a bridge being built to what I think will be a great year coming up in 2024-25. We had over half of our clubs finish distinguished or better. They did that by: growing their membership, attending club officer trainings, renewing dues, submitting their club officer list, and giving speeches. We had our area go Distinguished, our division go President’s Distinguished, and our district went Select Distinguished. We learned about new clubs that formed, including Dubois and Western Maryland in our division. This year provided us with a great example of why you don’t throw in the towel with a week left. In those eight days leading up to the end of the Toastmaster year, we made moves and led our district to success. It was great to be back in 2023-24 and I don’t think I missed a single meeting in Greensburg.

This week, in addition to my Laurel Highlands Toastmasters meeting, I also plan to attend Western Maryland’s meeting online this Thursday. Future club visits include Bakery Square (either virtual or in person) and Johnstown (in person) in August. I’m thinking about attending the Fall Symposium as well when it gets scheduled. Last time I checked, the date and venue were to be determined. Even with a new job, it hasn’t been hard making time for meetings and I’m still enjoying it. Life can get in the way and sometimes we have to give up what we like doing. I still like Toastmasters and I’m finding a way to make it work.

Five years ago, I was doing well. I was on the cusp of achieving my Distinguished Toastmaster award and got it in the Fall. I was visiting clubs. I got to visit the new Bakery Square Club that had just chartered that October. I made my visits to Cranberry High Noon and other clubs. Things were going great and then everything went to crap.

The pandemic introduced me to Zoom, which gave me an opportunity to visit other clubs in the District from my own home. I won the Spirit of Toastmasters award in September of 2020 for all my dedication to the District. I even took part in a panel discussion at Winter TLI in December on the Spirit of Toastmasters.

Despite winning the award, I was getting discouraged. Not so much in Toastmasters, but taking a hiatus would have benefited me. I was at my job of over 10 years and was ready for a change. I took a long break from the church but I’m getting back into God’s Word and embarking on a 28 day prayer journey. I got my DTM in 2019 and we’re still waiting for me to complete my first path four years later, but I’m getting close. I still think in-person meetings and events are better but, virtual meetings have grown on me since I got my laptop and bought a webcam.

I think I’m finally getting the hang of this Zoom and I’m embracing Pathways, finally.

In the speech that I evaluated at our meeting on Wednesday night, the speaker taught us to “start strong and end strong”. That’s what I’m hoping to do in today’s blog. After a few days away, on the heels of a very productive and very hot June, I ready to get back into my content.

Last night was the Fourth of July, and as is tradition we all got together at the Gaffron farm in Guffey. Rain was in the forecast, but it held off long enough for us to enjoy the fireworks and enjoy everyone’s company. I wasn’t able to stay for the fireworks but I did have fun visiting with my cousins, including the ones who came from afar.

I ate very well as there was plenty of food to be had, and a lot of desserts. I can’t believe I missed that carrot cake though. I brought cookies while Mom brought the charcuterie. I really loved the canolie tray though. A couple of things I could have done to make the night go better would have been to: take the night off. I thought the picnic was going to be Saturday so I asked off that day instead. A simple mistake but I enjoyed my vacation the week prior and my experience last night. Another thing that would have made the night go better: take a walk around the farm and get some pictures to put on my digital frame. I’m always looking at these kinds of things on the socials and have a few books on design, why not add some nice pics for good measure? One more way to make the night worthwhile: Having a slice of that carrot cake.

Back to Wednesday’s meeting. It was our first of the new Toastmasters year, which starts in July. That means we served in our new officer roles. After serving as President last year, I am taking on the role of Vice President Education in Greensburg. We heard a person giving their first speech (the ice breaker) and a more seasoned speaker (he was the one who told us to “Start strong and end strong”). Our District ended strong by becoming Select Distinguished due to the success of the clubs that are a part of it. Our Division was President’s Distinguished. All this is thanks to District Trio, Division Director, and Area Director and all of their hard work.

My Spirit of Toastmasters fire is burning once again, after having been extinguished as the pandemic hit, thus cramping my style. Also a factor was the process of rebuilding due to COVID and transitioning to a new job, all of which meant a new routine and taking time to get established. I’m still not 100% a fan of Zoom but I’m much better with it now than I was in the height of COVID. I even gave a speech standing up for the first time last week using the platform.

A few years ago when we went to the farm for the Fourth of July, I was dealing with regret. I felt like this gender nonconforming journey was a huge waste, as I lost most of my support system upon leaving WIS and living at home I got no support. I felt worthless as I walked away from the church the previous Fall. The person whom I depended on for encouragement in my journey had ghosted me.

I broke down to my cousin who was visiting with her family and that night I found no better support system than her. One thing I learned from her that I needed to do more was to practice self-love. My mom always tells me, if you like something (in this case, clothing) then that’s all that matters. My cousins were on my side that night and we even got tissues to dry our eyes.

Two years later, I look back on that night and see the progress I’ve made. I’m a better person and I learned those who mind don’t matter, while those who don’t mind, matter. Things turned around at the end of 2022 and while I had a few slumps in the next year, I broke out of them.

Finally, as we enter a new month and I just had a birthday, what better time to get back into the Bible? Seeing that July has 31 days, I’ve been reading the book of Proverbs. I haven’t stopped believing in God. I just needed a break to find myself.

Tomorrow, I’m going to start a month long project on prayer with the new books I bought on Amazon. I like the Evans family and I follow them on the socials. I’ve read a lot of Tony’s books as well as one from his son. His daughter was in a few of the Kendrick Brothers’ films as well as the upcoming movie in theatres this August. I look forward to being fed this summer as I get back into more inspirational reading.

Today marked my 23rd blog post for the month. A new record for me that passed December 2021 and this past December. It also marks the last day of my vacation as I get ready to go back to my routine tomorrow night. That means I’m back to sleeping during the day and getting used to working those late hours once again.

Our District in Toastmasters is Select Distinguished. Those eight days left in the Toastmaster year really paid off. For Greensburg, we were sitting at 11 members on June 22, about to come up short even though we did enough to be Distinguished at worst. We just needed members and our Division Director got to work to make sure I left the club in good hands as I move on from my Presidency. You don’t just throw in the towel and assume all is lost. Rather, you get to work and do all that you can do. Our club is going to finish Select Distinguished, and that’s a great feeling.

We had a nice day today for my birthday after strong storms and heavy rain hit our area hard yesterday. Getting to Johnstown yesterday was an adventure but I made the most of it. I was en route to the Westwood Plaza when US 30 was shut down due to an accident near Idlewild Park and Soak Zone. Traffic heading east had to be rerouted. I drove back out towards Kingston and took PA 217 through Derry and Blairsville. I showed up 45 minutes late but still got to see half the movie.

Knowing what I know now, I’d have taken US 22 to PA 56 or 403 instead of that long detour and all the backtracking that ensued. I won’t give away the plot of the movie for those who read this blog but I was fortunate to get in and watch the rest of the film in its entirety. I could have just stopped at the Hiram G. Andrews Center and walked around the building before meeting Aunt Sue and Ben at Eat’n Park after their movie. If I got there on time, I would have done the same things as planned.

I got some nice gifts for my birthday, from some plush Super Mario characters to a new journal and some pens. My birthday cards were good for a laugh, and I got a few gift cards from Old Navy and Giant Eagle. I ordered some new tops and jeans from Old Navy and I’m hinting at that Houndstooth coat once again as I think ahead to Fall. Maybe something leathery too. I have a jumpsuit in mind that I saw on Amazon after I failed the last time. It might be a great rest of summer and autumn outfit.

As we start the second half of 2024, I’m starting to think about fixing my relationship with Jesus. I ordered a couple of books on Amazon and when I’m not focused on Potter, I’ll be studying these and getting back into the Word and some uplifting music. It’s been three years. It’s time. I’ll also be scaling back on social media viewing, cutting it down to one or two days. I’ll still be sending links to blogs though and getting on Messenger.

In closing, I’ll take my own advice.

Don’t think ahead to Fall yet, James, enjoy Summer.